Thoughts 9/26/16

Posted: September 26, 2016 in Uncategorized

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything. I really can’t focus enough to write anything formal these days, so I guess I’m going to put out a scattershot of thoughts.

I worked in Law Enforcement for 12 years. Prior to that, I got my degree in Mortuary Science, and worked several years in Funeral Service. I’ve seen both sides of tragedy. Having lived in the South, I’ve seen racism, and reverse racism. I guess I know a little about a few things, but I’m certainly no expert.

With the news of the last few weeks, I often wonder what has happened to common decency.  Treating others as we would like to be treated. Respect for one another. Are these long gone? We don’t have to be a certain profession, religion, race, live in a certain location to be kind to someone.

I’ve never been big on those who are hypocritical, be it through professions, religion, etc. I know there are bad cops out there, and I call them out. They have no business wearing a badge, they are no better than anyone else. They are worse, thinking they are above others. Keep in mind, there are so many good officers out there who will put their lives on the line in an instant, even to protect those that disagree with them.

I may put some people off with my next thoughts, but this is how I feel. I was raised Catholic. Growing up I remember being told that so many things were sins. Yes, I even entertained thoughts of becoming a priest. Now, I will admit the church does many good things. They help the poor. At one point in my life I had to go to Catholic Charities for help getting my bills paid. That being said, their stance for many years protecting priests who abused innocent children is unforgivable. They will not allow a woman a right to an abortion, but if a gay couple attempts to adopt a child through one of their services, they will be turned away and the child will remain in limbo. Why the need to control other’s lives? As of now, I’ve stepped away from religion. It’s important to do right by others, treat others as I wish to be treated. I try to respect those around me. Sometimes, not all deserve respect. The lines between church and state in our country are too blurred. Religion and politics do not belong together. I’m happy to expand on this further if the situation dictates.

Let’s listen more and speak less. There is too much incessant jabber, nothing important being said. Say what you mean, mean what you say.

I hope to do this again soon. Stay safe, peace and love.


Disaster Dance

Posted: March 16, 2016 in Uncategorized

Here I am


Against the wall

Watching the dance

Smiles abound – so superficial


Yet the pangs of loneliness beckon me


You go by

I whisper “hi”

To the back of your head


Loud jovial laughter – I look up

Fingers pointed toward me

Yours is one

My heart falls


Fight them back

“You’re so fucking weak”


My island is infinity

Knowing everyone abandons me

My familiar demon reappears

Welcoming me back with open arms

Giving me strength

I walk away – My own demon


Posted: October 30, 2015 in Uncategorized

Rotting decrepit building

Homely desolate space

Walls caving in

Ornate architecture reduced to simple ruin

  • Worthless

Where once fire and brimstone sermons spewed

Faint echoes amongst silence

Ghosts pack shattered pews

Serpents slithering at will

Intertwined amongst themselves

Exiting the rotten doors

Wiping away memories of that spoken

Return to selfish evil ways

Twist man written words to fit their own needs

Practice what YOU preach

Who are you to judge me?

Misstep then criticize?

Fucking hypocrite

Do unto others

Your words ring hollow – as the crumbling church

A special place awaits – even ghosts fail to haunt

Your so-called fellow believers have arrived

Darkness welcomes you with open arms


Posted: September 16, 2015 in Uncategorized

Drought lingers seemingly forever

Dust warmly blankets landscape

First shot fired

  • Echo in the distance

Thunder of war

Roar of the beast within

Battle rages on

Cacophonous screams pierce

Tearing, seared flesh

Splattered blood

Splintered bone

The demon emerges

Is it I?


Merely a reflection?


I view the images of the war waged within myself

Casualties are numerous



Winner – unclear

I – my own demon – retreat


Posted: February 28, 2015 in Uncategorized

Longing for the night
My hands grasping, emptiness finds them
Search compassion for weakness
Walk away
Theirs owned not by you

Spirit – darkness longing
Pain screaming
Better if myself inflicted
Show your fear – MORE!
Bare yourself, be not modest now
My lifeblood surges
Yours exsanguinates
Soul departs
My energy builds

Serpents belly slithering – satisfied

Fragility Of Life

Posted: December 1, 2014 in Uncategorized

Straight line illusion
Two choice paths both incorrect
Chaos imminent

Protect me from my own evil
Blood on my hands
Shards of glass slice my feet

Have I done wrong?
– Bodies strewn in the midst of ruin
I was to do right
– Transmission error

Seeking refuse now
Smoke rising
Hate simmering

Treat them well
“Stab wounds, rear torso.”

My own breath
– Heartbeat
Hurricane – pounding

Pacing of both now slows
“Lost heartbeat”
Life ceases

Merely the spawn
Fucking worthless
Even Satan despises you
Passing the blame
Unable to assume responsibility
Coil into your uselessness
Into fetal position you cower
Assume nothing
Run away
You stand for nothing
Not even yourself